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| Ср, Мар 12, 2003 10:19am Профессор - 7727 d back | ↑↓ |
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How to Tell Your Girlfriend Her Beaver Stinks
Whoah, my girl's beaver smells like ... BEAVER!
Every guy has had a "hold your breath" experience when going downtown on a woman. Sometimes it's just a little fishy, and sometimes you feel like you might have found where they hid Jimmy Hoffa's corpse.
It's not always obvious to her, after all, she's rarely nosing around down there on her own, so you have to find a way to handle the situation.
First of all, recognize the probable causes:
- Many women smell different around their period, and it's perfectly normal to get a stronger, more musky scent from her. You might want to keep a little calendar so you know when to expect a visit from the cardinal. (Just keep it out of her sight.)
- A vagina has a delicate pH to maintain, and if it gets thrown out of whack, say, by some chemical or body imbalances, she might vary in her scent. If it's infrequent, don't worry. If it's consistent ... well, see below.
- She might not be terribly clean. I hate to say it, but guys are not the only ones who can get a little ripe now and again. She just might need a quick going over with soap (on the OUTside) to get her smelling like an Irish Spring again. Well, as close as possible, anyway.
And, remember, ALL women have some scent down there. You do, too. (No, I haven't smelled it personally, but your neighbor called me to complain. Just kidding...) It's the nature of our genitalia to give off a little pheremone whiff to gather some interest. We don't respond to pheremones the way we once did in caveman days, but there is some biological remnant that we haven't shed.
So, how do you tell her?
As with all the advice I give, I always recommend the Poop Sandwich method. What you want to do is keep the nasty part of your conversation sandwiched between two layers of nice tasty white bread - the bread being your compliments. Say something like: "Honey, I've REALLY enjoyed our sex lately. It just keeps getting hotter and hotter with you!" Give her a second to bask in this. Then: "Can I tell you a secret? Lately, I'm wondering if you knew that it was a bit ... (whisper) stronger than usual down there." She'll take on an Oh-No! look, but give her some time to explain what she thinks might be the problem. Then follow it up with another assurance. "I don't want you to think I'm turned-off, but I know that a woman like you doesn't want any secrets. As a matter of fact, I'm thinking we both go home and let me give you some fun..."
Hard to bring up nicely, but that's the best I can suggest for now. Woman are very sensitive to their hygiene.
Another approach is to let her know you intend on going down on her early, then, when you get home, coax her into taking a quick shower. She'll put 2 and 2 together. If she asks what's wrong, just say you like to get things all nice and "freshened up" for each other. She'll get the hint, and you won't have to insult her.
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